Music.Dance.Love.Life.

2011-02-05T01:21:00.001+08:00

am i.

really that bad?

2010-10-02T09:12:00.001+08:00

rejoice (:

2010-09-13T15:40:00.001+08:00

forbidden.

confusion.

stuck.

guilt.

breakaway.

closed in.

exit.

shame.

peace.

unknown.

help.

probably.

2010-05-26T02:06:00.001+08:00

he who sacrifice the indulgences of his greed shall garner the power to strive for his goal.

2010-03-03T05:54:00.002+08:00

without care,

i shall walk.

with regret,

i shan't cross.

without shame,

i won't pass.

with sense,

i will move

2010-01-31T16:52:00.004+08:00

worthless.
my life is.

unaccomplished.
i always am.

alive i am,
for death hasn't taken me.

insignificant my existance is,
for futile, my actions are.

my worth should not be given a care,
for care is for those in need.

a foolish ingrate living in self denial for no known cause,
walking this earth, waiting to turn to ash.
straying in a world of false connections,
of no emotions.
where emptiness fills within.

as each day passes,
i wonder,
when it will all end,
a useless person like me.

2010-01-28T03:42:00.003+08:00

only a month after the new year passed have i come up with a proper new year resolutions.

1: get GPA 3.5 at least.
2:get a steady flow of money anywhere else but home.

2009-12-14T00:27:00.003+08:00

useless.
i've never felt so futile.
for what i've done doesnt achieve my goals.

un-wanted.
walking past all.
without being the attention of anyone.

stressed.
for everything is piled onto me.
in which my future lies heavily

Lost.
for i realised i've been doing things that i need to do.
and changed wants to be needs.
and theres nothing i want to do now.
and i need to do everything.
for if i do not,
i will be nothing.

i will never be good enough for what i need,
i will never be competent in what i want
try as i may, but that has been my life

2009-12-06T04:22:00.002+08:00

there isn't, there shouldn't, there wouldn't and there must not be any occasion for jolly joyous joy in the world.

for there never is a season where i will be jolly.

2009-10-14T06:46:00.000+08:00

sacrifices are always required for the pursue of greater wants.

gotta continue making the sacrifice that i stopped

2009-10-10T03:50:00.001+08:00

im just gonna rant on this random thought that spurred in my mind.

Life when unknown, and known to be in blight.

We are all here living day by day.
carrying out each and everyone's activities.
in an all repeating cyclic pattern that we humans, animals, ghosts and whatever there might be, simply adhere to strictly.
and i don't know if you realised it yet.
have have thought of it this way.
but...

WHY!??!
i've always been asking myself questions on life.
be it in good or bad times.
i realise that there are questions answered in faith.
i realise that there are answers questioned by science.
i realise that the science that creates us logically withstands faith many times,
yet the human mind, heart and soul simply overpowers science with faith many times too.

before, i questioned the existence of life.
i question the big question of creation and existence.

i questioned the very conscience of our mind.

for why do we see things and call things the way they are?
for example, why are 'things' called 'things'?

why do we speak languages, and how can we classify what is a language or not, when a language is but just a word to define the form of communication we use, which is again, NOT very defined at all.

i question existence. i question purpose.
i asked the sky, 'why am i here?'
the answer?

..........

yeah. expectedly unsatisfying.

so i thought to myself again.

are we here just as a phase to another reign of another sub-race that will take over?

are we here just to die by another global destruction?

or.. are we here just to create the substance called 'plastic' cause the Earth 'just felt like it'?

BUT then again. some answers just CAN'T be found.
hence, i brushed these thoughts aside, kept them till i find some clues on answering them, and continued living this cycle called LIFE.

and then it struck to me.

WHY DO WE LIVE LIFE?!!?
is it because we are happy that we live life?
is it because of responsibilities that we continue life, be it how positive or negative it might be?
what is being happy or sad anyways? emotions have become such a muddled state that it lacks the definition as a population, but more of individuality
then again, its but just perception of mind, i'll not touch on this.

i now question human morals.
human rights.
first off, what 'rights' do we have to even 'live'?
the Earth would be in a jolly good state without the mess we're creating.
and funny enough, with all known facts about the danger we create for nature AND OURSELVES, we still do not care, and continue living a 'standard life'.

that is, still putting in the bunch of crap into the atmosphere, water and land.

Another point is,
we all live our lives as if we have a purpose in life.
have anyone thought, 'im living life just because im alive'?
why not twist the sentence to... ' im dead just because im dead and... oops. i cant be alive again. oh wait, i'd probably die anyways'
if u know your future was unknown, would you venture into it?
WELL KNOWING that it has both ups and downs?
how about growing up into the future only to realise that you'd probably live a not so satisfactory lifestyle... in the dumps perhaps?

why would you not take your own life into your own hands and kill youself?
we are all made of cells and powered by electrical impulses.
with so many humans, one less mass of carbon-based lifeform switched off from the lack of electrical impulses coming from the brain doesn't really matter much to me.
and of course, we ALL would die someday, its just a matter of how and when.
yet theres still so many humans on this Earth.

and now, i question myself.
i do not know what my future is.
whether is it, in technicality, HAPPY or SAD.
whether is it socially satisfactory.
hell, i have no freakin' clue of whats to come in my life.
and yet, I am still living it with no clue of whats to come.

to those who know me, ya'll would say,
'wad about dance? don't u live to dance?'
i'd say,' i dance to live'
cos i wasn't created to dance.
but dancing sure keeps me slightly more satisfied than before.
but i STILL cant see myself dancing for a living in the far off future.
so, its still question of why am i living my life!
with so many years to come, things are sure gonna come down hard.
but i just don't know what they are...

THEN again... as the famous saying goes.
"Life is full of surprises!!"
hell yeah. surprises i don't wana know.
whats the point of living with surprises when you don't know the end?!

OK i've written a jolly good amount of mind-crap to allow myself to sleep in peace.
its been a while since i had such a rant on my thoughts.

last time i did it was...
mid last year...
thats long...

TO anyone who reads, i do not expect comments.
but hey, do feel free to leave a tag to flame my 50%-flawed argument.
lol, so much for modern mathematical precision.

2009-09-09T03:02:00.000+08:00

hey yeah.

just to update this blog thats been neglected quite badly...

exams are over and done with, marking the half way mark of my poly life...

and the start of holidays!!!

time for dance dance baby!!!
and of course more time with my dearest too(:

to make full use of my time this period,
feel like taking up some musical skills too by myself.
hmm... wonder how'd that will turn out.

2009-08-24T04:40:00.000+08:00

meddle less in external affiars...

instead sought the wisdom within for power and knowledge.

a mental note to self...

on a lighter and heavier note,

EXAMS ARE HERE...

yea its that time of the half-year..

the bright side is 1.5months of pure freedom with new kicks and clothes to rock in.

and more sleep!!!

2009-07-18T03:58:00.000+08:00

its been a long time since anything came from or reached to this place called the bottom of my heart.

i feel empty.

2009-07-08T05:17:00.000+08:00

humble the mind.
Silence the noise.
clear your thoughts.
concentrate.
Focus.
Empty all the irrelavance.
for silence breeds all needed to grow.
to mature.
To be better.
To be sensible.
To be responsible.
Think before the words spill.
You shape yourself.

Peace

2009-06-22T03:19:00.000+08:00

yeah just to update.
been too busy with dance and all
have not studied nor did any work these holidays so far.

feel like im part of something yet not part of it..

but ya, least i hang out with my crew and all, feel i belong somewhere abit more.
other than that,

still loving that oh-so-cute-and-beautiful girl of mine(:
always around for me.

and of course,
my dance to accompany me.
finally managed to change the mindset.
for those who don't know, the mind is much harder to mould than the sculptured body.
for one who achieved a mind that is needed, the mould for the body follows suit.

lastly, my bro got some Kaos pads and MIDI pads.
woot, looking forward to creating some stuff with those toys.

2009-06-05T02:28:00.000+08:00

i've not felt this much self doubt and self disappointment in myself for a long time.

i lost the meaning to do wad i do love and do best.

am i lying to myself?

2009-05-26T04:23:00.000+08:00

wads wrong with me again.

you fool.

2009-05-20T02:54:00.000+08:00

been a while since an update...

nothing much...
busy with school work.
TBG practices.
KOnights practices.

social wise, im pretty in the dark alrdy.
been to caught up with my own stuff.

and for KO night.
all i can say is.

show them swagger,
and enjoy the crowd.
dance cos u want to dance and share the joyous experience,
not for the kill.

said once, say it again,
dance to express, not to impress.
simple sentence that many miscomprehend,
though the meaning is just that blatant.

most importantl,
my dear has been getting sick more often due to insufficient rests and all...
darn, hope the school aint gonna give her more stuff to do,
she's alrdy in a shape thats not good.
and i aint even have time for myself, and for her.
damn...

2009-04-28T02:15:00.000+08:00

aimless goals.
burnt out passion.
im too tired too fast.
i aint want much for now.
i want to sleep.

2009-04-11T05:46:00.000+08:00

yeah.

just got a good vibe from everything around me.

cheers(:

hope it lasts..

2009-04-08T05:15:00.001+08:00

something somewhere please inspire me

i lack motivation.

darn

2009-03-28T04:16:00.000+08:00

damn.
my dance.
my feel.
something is wrong with my brain. my mind.
my stubborn immature mind.
it's been a while since i had such emotions typing a post.

but yeah.
i was proceeding smoothly on the scales of improvement last year.
all the way through many events.
only till recently.
my mind changed.
somehow. somewhere along that timeline.
this period.
i screwed up.

i lost my sight.
i lost the goal.
i lost the meaning of what i was doing all along.

i want to dance well again.
to feel the same way.
to look and feel that natural, be it awkward.
i want to express the way i expressed it before.
not now. cause the current movements are comparably incoherent with what the music dictates.

looking through my previous blogposts in my old blog.
i tried to relive the memories.
revive those thoughts.

WHY DID I DANCE.

after a session today.
i spoke to Ben online.
he made my realise how different i am.
BOTH as a dancer. a person.
MY DISCIPLINE IS LAUGHABLE.
the action of others taunt my childish eyes.
where was the self concerned me.
the one who actually cared how i dance FOR myself to see.
i realised how far i have slided down in dance.
horrific is how i would term it.

past posts.....

post ONE:
i need to feel.
express.
the music.
my soul, my body. my mind. my heart.
movements from my feelings. not thought up.
freedom to move away from control.
clarity of my soul to all.
to impress
is to express.

post TWO:
letting others see feelings.
through movements not words.
unification of music, heart, soul, mind, body
freedom of movement. care
free inhibitions let loose
every twitch speaks volumes.
each bit of steps tells emotions unbound of fear
.DANCE.
expression through movements.
one step closer?
soon to know.

these are constant words that are processed last time,
in these now-worthless brain cells of mine
i wish to conjure up such miracles in my mind and body AGAIN.
but with such a weakened soul.
dampened morale from a down heart.
i find no motivation.
i find it hard to step out and reach out for that personal glory.

NOT THE GLORY OF WINNING.
but the glory of attaining self satisfaction.
glory of dance.
of knowing that people appreciate you.
only because you appreciate yourself first.
of that connection with the music that can be established.

i must tell and remind myself.
why i dance.
what is dance.
to me.
its to break free from daily mundane routines that eat away my mind from connecting to humane activities.
to connect with a source that contains so much soul and feeling that i feel so attracted to.
TO NOT GIVE A DAMN AND BE FREE.
quote from BEN....
'fuck! just dance!'

thanks man. you just made me realise exactly what i have been lacking for such a long period that have passed me unnoticed.

i. want. to. dance.

2009-03-25T04:13:00.000+08:00

right now i need 4 things.

My confidence.

My determination.

My dance.

most importantly, Rongxin(:

nothing much to be updated.
till next time.
ciao...

2009-03-11T02:17:00.000+08:00

hmm..

been a long time since i put anything here.

lazy to remember the details of what had happened.

so i'll just put down current thoughts of now...

i need to be a better dancer.
i need more practice.
i lose my dance.
and i need it back.
everyone around me is improving.
im stagnant shit.
im so lousy i dropped in ranks so bad.
i feel so stiff i aint dancing no more.
hope that i can help myself now with the tight compeition.

i need to be a better person.
to judge reasonably.
to talk necesarrily.
to understand.

i need to be a better boyfriend.
i fail as one in my opinion.
damn..

2009-02-15T02:39:00.001+08:00

this day.

valentines day.

many have passed me uncelebrated.

except this year.

:)

celebrating valentines for the first time was ever so joyful!!
thanks xiao rong for the presents.
the photo collage was oh so sweeettt!!! im hanging it next to my bed.
and my birthday present is speechless.

IT'S AWESOME.
but please dun get something so expensive again ok?
I dun need something so expensive from you dear!!
feel quite bad that its so ex!!!

glad u enjoyed the day(:

(and meeting so many people at the zoo was way too conincidental. haha)

2009-02-04T03:02:00.000+08:00

daaayummm..

my birthday passed and i didnt really feel much?
been caught up with stuff.
didnt really celebrate it too.
for ur info, my bday is on 2nd Feb, check the darn profile. lol
and and.
im 18!!
dun look like it?
well too bad, i am.

so yeah.
i suddenly feel..old.

as in.. feel like that i am really old... like...

...

looking my age??
HAHA!

people been guessing im way older but i dun feel that age.
now that im approaching the age of wad people tink i am, i suddenly DO feel old.

like... for once, my birthday really didnt mean much to me.
no hype. no birthday dinner with family.
just a simple cake at home with mum and bro,
and the 18gachapon from my classmates [ i gotta say, the most memorable gift!!]
i only celebrated birthdays with friends a few times... but like 1 or 2 days beforehand...
wasn't elaborate. just a cake and a song, glad enuf(:

but with exams coming.
getting less sleep.
Seeing her sick and working still.
and danceworks.
and wanting to session more but no time.
and the meeting that occured on monday.

i seriously didnt feel like my birthday at all. lol
hell. it my birthday initials weren't so easy to rmb as 221991.
i might have even forgetten my birthday!!

but then again, its just a birthday(:
a day of happiness just cause of the day i was borned??
aint much.
cos i've changed to a happier person alrdy.. i guess. lol
a day isnt much compared to the past year.
peace is all that matters.
most of all, having my love, my xiao rong,
that is alrdy my birthday present(:

CLUBBING HERE I COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NOT!!
lol.

2009-02-02T02:09:00.000+08:00

sorry for the late updates.
been busy with stuff and all.

aint really gotta write up and every single stuff.

rather. something most recent, that is funkamania.

pretty shit i'd say. funka has died if each year is gna be this way.
but darn. 4000bucks, thats a loada cash.

after party was dope, music half-sucked, but the spontaneous friends of mine never fail to bring out each others need to dance, mine included.

approaching xinying to battle for fun when Bojangles played,
becoming a small cypher,
then into the biggest circle.
never knew wad we did snowballed to such a large scale.

most importantly,
each day spent with my dear is the happiest(:
seeing her smile just calms me.
being with her makes me happy already.

seeing her sickly on the CityAlive event really made me worry.
feared she would faint or something.
luckily she wasnt that sick(:
just tired.

and yeah.
Dear ah.... jiayou doing your work ok?
hope you won't need to burn into the night so often anymore..

2009-01-16T05:10:00.000+08:00

Love note to her:

Girl. I want to be with you for as long as I can.

I'll try my best to always be with you whether you need me or not.

my heart aches seeing you suffer as you do your work,

but I understand its a choice you can't avoid too.

A simple shoulder is all i can offer always,

but I'll still think of ways to make you feel better always.

With you by my side,

I feel calm

the sorrows cast aside,

Tranquility resides within now.

i feel proud that i have a girlfriend like you.

simple yet independant.

ever jovial.
with that signature smile.

casting all blight away.

knowing that someone treasures me as much as i treasure her,
its priceless. nothing else can beat this.

Even though we can't always be together due to various reasons...
but with the tremendous amount of trust that you put in me,
i know how much i mean to you.

And i want you to know,
You're forever in my mind, my eyes and my heart.
you're my star.
Loving you always.

To my special girl, RongXin.

2009-01-08T01:53:00.000+08:00

im not planning on loving anyone else like how i am loving you.

nono.

i aint gonna love anyone else but you.

my dear girl,
you are all that i can ever ask for.
thank you for being with me.

i love you(:

2009-01-03T03:21:00.000+08:00

year 2008 passed

summarise it in a short paragraph:

been great. had my share of ups and downs.
took part in many dance events.. well not many... but hey... it was more or less worth my time... made a bunch of frens in poly.. and many more frens in foreign bodies... my studies still goin stable...joined events like oschool recital that allowed me to know even more nice people around me....last but not least, i ended this year with the best gift ever... my XiaoRong(:

resolutions for 2009:

better boyfriend.
better Son.
Better Brother.
Better Student.
Better Person.
Better Life!!

Lastly,
BEST DANCER!!
:P:P

2008-12-29T01:19:00.000+08:00

yeah. many things happened past few days.

cut it short.

im the most happy, lucky and loved guy right now.

now that i have you(:

I AM AN OFFICIAL SMILING FOOL!!!
and im glad to be one

2008-12-26T02:22:00.000+08:00

cos it just feels right(:

2008-12-24T04:34:00.000+08:00

gonna need some isolation soon.

personal growth in every aspect i suppose.

time for change....

again.

2008-12-16T21:19:00.000+08:00

to osaka.

17th to 24th.

till then.
cya.

2008-12-15T03:48:00.000+08:00

my existence.

a help or hindrance.
bringer of sadness or happiness.
of importance or of no need.
a life of reality or of facade.
of truth or deceit.

flowing adrift

forlorn power
or
guided weakness

2008-12-14T05:22:00.000+08:00

FB prodcution over
good job guys
many of ya'll performed for the 1st time and it was good i must say
even thou b4hand all the items and tech were fucked up
ya'll managed to buck up in time for the real deal.

the 1st time i smiled non stop for so long..
cos i was doin backstage after doin my opening solo.
and boy..i could feel it from everyone.
felt really happy that everyone is giving their all.

specially to the Whinies.
good expression even thou many 1st timers.

530 am.
sweet.

2008-12-11T01:10:00.000+08:00

find strength through weakness.
(:

at times i really don't know what my future is.
dancer?
lab researcher?
...
...

street sweeper?
prob dance with a broom then.
lol

but yeah...
my passion is dance.
and living as a dancer isnt exactly money frenly. lol

2008-12-10T01:15:00.000+08:00

FOREIGN BODIES PRODUCTION..

WOOTTTT~!~!!

....

COMMON TESTS...

.shit.

2008-12-07T21:37:00.000+08:00

girl too fine.
i shy away.
in sensical self argument.
i lost myself in confusion.

helpless to help.

i find myself frail and unsure oncemore.

not knowing if this should persist

for the wants outweighs the needs.

2008-12-07T00:47:00.000+08:00

i gotta stay on track.
i cant lose my focus.
i gotta know my priorities.
i cant stray off my principles.

when staying away, is the only thing i should do.
viewing in the distance?
the saying of, the best way of liking is to not like, holds true i guess.
and its cause, i cant do anything.
and i have nothing to give.
for my absence brings best,
albeit in ironic fashion.

2008-12-03T00:54:00.000+08:00

am i a friend?

i go to my friends in trouble and they're always there for me.

yet even if my friends are in trouble... i can't really help them.

i feel like i only talk to people when i have my troubles. and without troubles i dun talk to them anymore.

wad the hell is wrong with me.

2008-12-02T01:00:00.000+08:00

damn.
i lost my 'dance feel'

shit shit shit

damn.
common test next week

shit shit shit.

things come and things get lost just at the wrong time dun they.

argh~~~~

*wears red bandana*

SCREW PROCRASTINATION ONCE MORE~!~!

*bangs head into wall..... again.*

2008-11-27T18:45:00.000+08:00

ahhh......

work load OFF..
dancing half-hardcore.

common tests in 2 weeks and havent started studying...

but i'll rest this weekend 1st(:

to all my friends who somehow manage to stumble across this 'hidden' blog,
feel free to link me! :D

to those hu wana keep annonymous and comment on my posts...
please write hu u are.
in case i scold the wrong person.
cos i can write a whole load of crap to retaliate.

then again. i wont.
not worth my time nor thinking.

back on life topics...

GETTING BACK SLEEP IS THE SHITZXZX.

feeling loads better.

didnt win floor the love...
but hell... i like the way i dance, and i feel happy bout it(:
enjoyment is all tat matters.
to all those who joined FTL for the 1st time, its a first step.
there's wrong or bad.
enjoy dance and dance without stress..
i cant find a link in the meaning of 'stress' and 'dance'.

take care yeah.
its not worth feeling this way (:

2008-11-23T06:16:00.000+08:00

is it just me.

or am i starting to get out of place in where i am.
does staying up till 7am have to do anything with this too?

darn this feeling to damnation even though it painfully seems so.

un-needed.
un-wanted.
why are these feelings back again?

i feel so. alone once more.

with dance and studies.
i left out life and friends.

2008-11-17T22:29:00.000+08:00

now i feel helpless.

helpless that i cant help people that i want to help.

i used to not care bout myself and able to talk to people anytime anywhere and able to help.

now that i care more bout myself, i find it hard to connect to people that i want to help.

help anyone? lol.

2008-11-16T20:56:00.000+08:00

i officially have matching clothes to rock with my matching shoes.

sweet(:

2008-11-13T20:01:00.000+08:00

emptiness fills me,
as i remember what i cant forget.
live moves on,
but memories stay.

2008-11-13T03:40:00.000+08:00

my life's already decided.

Dance and Studies.

with these two, i have NO time for any social activities...
even if i do... prob once or twice a month only.
with my current mindset of life that i attained ages ago...
and my mental age that does not suit my physical body..
(even though i dun look my age to begin with)...
im so gonna be the odd one out soona or ltr...
like there's some kinda inner conflict of the child and adult within me. lol

either dancing at night.
or mugging my brain away.

should i ever develop any socialising disabilities,
the reason should be pretty blatant to realise.

DANCE:

Floor The Love 2008.

IMMA FLOOR SOME LURVE.

STUDIES:

2 tests and 1 proposal. one group food project.
none started proper

IMMA GET MY ASS WHOOPED FOR THIS.

if i dun mug when my dance stuff lessens.

2008-11-09T04:19:00.000+08:00

*wears a red headband*

SCREW PROCRASTINATION!!!!

*bangs head on wall*

2008-11-08T01:59:00.000+08:00

hmmm...

find it weird,
that im acting the total opposite of wad i felt last year and so on.
and feeling the total exact opposite, same for my thinking too.

things have changed so much.

yeah.

things REALLY changed.

everything, everyone, myself.
do i regret change?
hmm. maybe not.

2008-11-06T02:07:00.000+08:00

intergrating myself back into a known realm,
even though i ought to be in it already.
weirdly difficult.

2008-11-03T02:53:00.000+08:00

its 3am.
im doin work.
waking at 630am.
god.
im on an unwanted suicidal life and i dun mind(:

tutorials, projects, presentations.
interclass stuff.
DANCE.

yea u can do all these.

thou u'd probably have free eyeshadow on the bottom eyelids.
pretty instantaneous too.

and its not even exams period yet.

now this,
is wad i call.
WACK!

PS:
screw the darn mothafugga hu said poly was slack.
imma whoop his ass big time.

2008-10-29T03:09:00.000+08:00

For those who know my previous blog... you would know what is the undying wind and all...

im here to say.. the wind still blows... always. every single day.

but the wind is not one that brings sadness.

its brings life.

it brings me MUSIC.

it brings me MUSIC to let me DANCE.

it brings me MUSIC to let me DANCE so i can EXPRESS.

it brings me MUSIC to let me DANCE so i can EXPRESS and feel GOOD.

anyone and everyone out there.
u gotta love music.
be it of any genre or for whatever reason.
cos u gotta admit the fact.
music makes u feel and think.
music calms ur nerves and yet ruffles your feathers... not a good description but wad the hell.

A beat. A voice. A melody.
can be one of them, two of em, and three.
so long as the product has feeling in it... the listener will feel it too.
just one of them... is enough to make my body move.

move to the feelin of the song. my feelin of the song. the overall feeling combined.
losing myself in the flow of feelings that i wont want to stop.

MUSIC. makes me. Breaks me. Heals me. Kills me

NO MUSIC. NO DANCE.
gotta listen and feel to everything. never be picky bout songs.
if u cant dance to a song and refuse to even try.
then i must really doubt you.

2008-10-27T05:13:00.000+08:00

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it,
I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

2008-10-25T02:10:00.000+08:00

2ways with dealing with downs in life.

1: digging a shithole, burying yourself in shit, and being shit itself.
not reccomended, but works nonethless(i used to do this.. not exactly pleasant)

2: DEAL with the fact that a problem has happened. ACCEPT the problem. LEARN(?) from the problem....... better yet, solve the shit... leaving shit around aint nice. lol

A method that im doing now. hopefully successful? lol. but there'll always be problems... some u wished that aint occured too.

so yeah. i aint exactly a shit remover.
but im always around to hear a penny of your thought's
your problems.
drop a message...
i'll hit ya back no time and all(:

2008-10-24T00:22:00.000+08:00

this is not it.

i refuse.

for once i will be selfish.

live for the moment and trusting myself.

i learnt that.

trusting others.

i learnt that.

coming out from my hole.

i learnt that.

to give my heart.

i learnt that.

who allowed me confirmed that all these is true?

you did.

please.

don't let me be who i was.

i got back my heart.

my soul.

i relearned emotions.

i saw hope.

i let my feelings lead me rather than my mind.

you helped me grow.

im still changing, its not complete.

i need you.

Cos its for you.

i'm human now.

and i want to stay human.

not the dark creature i was.

2008-10-23T00:36:00.000+08:00

Later Post:
things happen fo reasons.
u need to find em out first
nothing happens just because it is(:
well... even thou certain phenomonems are unexplainable.
human activity are sometimes based on illogical/logical tinking differing from person to person.
oh the irony.
toast to life anyone?

and cheer up!

side note:
DARN.
i HATE it when my ANKLE RHEUMATISM comes back.
frikkin irritating.

2008-10-22T20:49:00.000+08:00

Earlier Post:
today.
is.
the.
happiest.
day.
of.
my.
life.
(:

thanks.
and dun worry so much ai!
relax.
its been done.
we don't know wad will happen yet.
we'll take things as they come aye(:
then again, i might refuse what comes.
shucks.

2008-10-21T00:56:00.000+08:00

hey people(:
new blog.
eh...
new blog aint really mean new things..

just that... i have changed.
thanks to someone thou.
pretty obvious who(:

and yeah..
i will TRY MY BEST to bid emo-ness goodbye.

i pray for the best.
not just for me.
but for you.
i really hope all turns well.